TeesTrans Transgender Support Group

My father died two years ago today. I was there when he passed away. I have never allowed myself to grieve for that loss until today. My father never knew me. He never met me. I never got to dance with him. I shall never know whether he would have accepted me, tolerated me, loved me, hated me, rejected me, disowned me. I shall always have those questions in my head and they will never get answered. I know he was a good father and a good husband but would he have accepted his daughter? I have grieved for him today, all alone, no hand to hold, no warm human hand to hold while I hurt and cried for him, for me, for mum, for my family. Tonight I received a beautiful bunch of flowers from my ex in memoriam of my father and our loss. Included was a note explaining why she will not see me. I have texted my brothers sending my wishes and support for today. I have had no response. Nobody has asked me how I feel. I have felt so much hurt today that I am almost numb with it.